Perfectionist?

I now wonder about first year. Quite funny tho. While lecturer has made things easy for me, I made things pretty difficult for myself. ha ha. Then I realize hey first yr law subjects are quite easy but what I thought was that.. Huh?? How do you prove this case? Burden of proof? Evidence? How come can reach this judgment and etc etc.. Made life difficult for myself.

I feel very uncertain when I have to answer question during tutorial time. Unless I need to rescue the situation, I usually won't answer. But I do lah to gain marks hoping in my heart lecturer will not question me further. U c? Then I read someone's blog and I wonder am I a perfectionist? Maybe yes huh!! ?? 

I kinda dislike perfectionist cux they have to be perfect in everything though not so perfect. However, I always wonder about lots of things. Even as I answer 1 question, my mind will race to another question pretty fast. So that's why when I answer something, I'm pretty unsure of it cux there's always UNENDING QUESTIONS racing on my mind. I have to feel confident enough before I can answer but then I realize lecturers are not even expecting us undergrads to be perfect. Just some answers on the surface will do. Why do I push myself so hard? Funny when I think about it.

Maybe I should continue my master. I really want to learn more and deeper about something. 10-12 weeks of semester doesn't really help you much. YOu have to learn so many things but on the surface only. While I continue to question, I know I won't get answer. Besides, I don't have the time to search for all the answers to my questions. Sometimes I wonder if my question is even logic. haha..That's why it's safer at times to ask friends instead of lecturer although I yearn and thirst for extra knowledge from lecturer. Dilemma.

Is this what you call perfectionist? I don't think I am. 

Life is full of wonders when you get answers to your questions. 

Rainbow behind the darkness. =)


*BTW I got a little irritated that someone who don't sit beside me will actually be so nice to me during exam. I seriously don't treasure such friends. YOu think I am your exam answering machine?? U'll always be stupid this way you know. *

Good day!!!